Celebrity Poker Showdown
My mom bought my dad a Texas Hold 'em poker set for Christmas. It is not a spectacular set with all sorts of chips--it's just a deck of cards and enough chips for maybe a few people. We started playing games, like Balderdash, on Christmas Day. Mark and I left to go to visit his side of the family. According to my father, the Texas Hold'em set was taken out after Balderdash and a new gambler was born.
Dad said Mom got really into playing Texas Hold 'Em. She doesn't really know what she's doing; she doesn't know a straight from a flush and I highly doubt she would know if she had a full house. Dad said she took the 'Dealer' chip (you are supposed to put it in front of you when you deal) and claimed it was worth $10,000 so she could stay in the game.
The following Monday, I invited my father and brothers over to play Texas Hold'em. When my father stopped by my mom's to pick up the Hold'em set. She started asking him questions like where he was going with it and what was he doing. She seemed genuinely disappointed that someone somewhere was playing poker without her.
To assuage her feelings, I decided to put together the Coniff-Rouleau celebrity poker tournament on New Year's Day. Mark, Dad, Patrick, Katie,me and Marlene played. We even broke into another set of poker chips so we had enough for everyone to stay in for awhile.
One of the issues I have playing poker with some of my family members is that they know not what 'poker face' means. My mother kept trying to get my sister to show her her cards. When Marlene had a good card in her hand, her face instantly lit up. She would also ask questions, so that you knew what hand she was planning. Marlene held onto the dealer chip tight because, she claimed, it was worth 10 million dollars. When she finally threw it into the pot, we all said, "Ooohhh."
I told her, "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run--."
"Yeah, yeah," she said, ignoring the words of Kenny Rodgers.
Although my mother was able to dazzle us with her lack of card playing abilities, she lasted halfway through the tournament. Mark ended up winning the tournament.
On the way home, Mark asked me, "So, how long do you think your mom would last in Vegas?"
I told him, "About a half hour. But that would be if she gambled away the house and her car."
I think my mom is looking for more people to play Texas Hold 'em with her.
